, , , , , ,

Did I ever tell you about Thomas? Thomas was a guy I met on the internet. And, although I have mostly learned my lesson that all men I meet online are generally not right for me, every now and then I get curious (see: in need of a confidence boost) and log in for a few days. Thomas was the result of one of these moments of weakness.

How we met was very romantic. He messaged me, I messaged him back. He gave me his phone number on the 2nd message; I figured, ‘what the hell..’ and gave him mine in response. **End transmission. So much so that I forgot about him. So, imagine my surprise when my phone started to ring one day and it said “Thomas Internet” on it. Thomas??? Who is Thomas??? At least I had the foresight to put his last name as “Internet” because then I was able to log in and look him up to jog my memory. Oh, right…Thomas….

We talked on the phone and agreed to meet for ice cream that night. He was at his parents’ house for Friday night dinner and had a party to go to at 9pm, so he could squeeze me in between 7pm and 8:30pm to meet face to face. How lucky was I?

We met and it was pretty nice, to be completely honest. Short, but nice. He’s attractive with an older look. He’s 33, which is right in my ballpark.

At the end of our evening, he said he was going to find me on facebook. I told him he couldn’t because I’m invisible on facebook (teacher and all, you know..) and said I would try to find him. As the words were coming out of my mouth, I regretted them. I hate facebook. I hate facebook. I hate facebook. I don’t believe in using facebook to get to know someone. I don’t believe in being friends on facebook with people you aren’t friends with in real life. And I especially hate facebook for dating purposes (especially since I have obsessive and over-thinking tendencies). I had painted myself into a corner: If I didn’t friend him on facebook, he would think I wasn’t interested; if I did, I was opening a can of worms with introducing him to my facebook life. What to do?

I caved and friend-ed him the next day. Big mistake. From that moment on, he exclusively used facebook to communicate with me. I didn’t get it; he had my number. why wasn’t he just being a normal Israeli guy and calling me? I put up with intermittent facebook messaging and facebook chatting for 2 weeks. He only attempted to make plans once. It was a half-assed, failed attempt. After that, I decided I was done with Thomas. If his 33 year-old-self wasn’t man enough (or interested enough) to call me directly to chat or make plans, he’s not the guy for me.

Cut to a month later when I am already in the US. Thomas facebooks me (big surprise) to say that he might be coming to the US and would I be available to meet up in NYC if he comes. What??? I couldn’t get this guy to take me out for a drink when we were in the same city, and now that I’m an ocean and a few countries away, he wants to make tentative plans for when and if he comes to NYC this month??? Sure, I said. Let me know when you’re arriving. Knowing how expensive plane tickets are and how long it takes the average Israeli to acquire a visa to come to the US, I said “see you in NYC” with full confidence that he will not be arriving in the next 3 weeks while I’m stateside.

Ridiculous. Can you believe the chutzpah of this guy???