Remember my crazy ex-boyfriend, James? The border-line abusive, horrible human being? Well, unfortunately and apparently, he can’t take a hint.
A few nights ago, my phone beeped in the middle of the night. I had an incoming skype call from James. I was asleep, considering it was 4AM here, so I silenced the ringer and rolled over. When I woke at a normal hour that day, I looked at my phone and I had a message from him:
what is your mailing address?
Uh oh. Don’t send me stuff. Don’t mail me a letter (especially a personal one). Don’t send me a postcard (even though I kind of love postcards). Don’t even send me presents (even though I enjoy receiving presents). Just, don’t. In fact, don’t contact me. Stop contacting me. I get it, you’re unhappy. You feel like you lost something (see: me.). Read my lips: not my problem.
This, of course, is everything I wanted to say. I wanted to pick up the phone right then and there and tell him to take whatever it is he wants my address for and shove it… …what did I actually do? I ignored the message.
Cut to today. I had all but forgotten about the request for my address when the following message from James appeared on my phone:
I might be going to Italy in April with the school – meet me there?
Riiiiight. Because that is going to happen. What on earth makes him think that I would jump on a plane for him? How wonderful of a boyfriend he was? What a fabulous pair we made (well, we did, sometimes)? How nicely he treated? Even, how amazing the sex was all the time?
Again, I ignored the message. What do you want from me? You know how I feel. You know where I stand. Nothing has changed.
Maybe it seems like the passive way out, but the best I can do is ignore him. I’m all talked-out when it comes to him. He just doesn’t hear me when I speak. Or maybe he doesn’t believe me. But, there’s nothing I can say that I haven’t already said many times before. He’s probably not used to the Joan that doesn’t need him. But, as it turns out, I never actually needed him. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but it’s the truth.