I’ve been toying with a new theory lately. It seems to me that in dating, everything goes well until you tell people about the new relationship you’re in. Or maybe it’s just me. Maybe I’m too susceptible to outside influence (this includes positive influences). I think that when I tell my friends or family about someone new, even though I usually say things like “but I’m not sure if this is serious or not yet,” my people always assume that this guy is it for me and then their carried-away-ness puts me in my head about what things are or where things are going.
I also think that talking about stuff confuses me. I feel like I have it together in my head, then I talk about it out loud and I get all confused. I start to over react and my confusion leaks into my personality when I’m hanging out with dude-man, whoever it happens to be at the time. Not talking about it means that there’s nothing to talk about, which means that everything is fine. Because it is. Everything is actually fine.
That said, my theory now is that if I just don’t tell anyone until something is official and serious between me and a new guy, I can avoid the “kiss of death,” so to speak.
Getting overly excited and hopeful, then gushing all about everything to my closest friends is a bad habit, I’ve decided. Historically, I’ve sought my friends’ advice because I’m not the relationship expert…especially the new/starting-a-relationship expert. As we’ve established before, relationships scare me a little. I should clarify that I don’t just want to be in a relationship. I want to be in the relationship with the right man.
I have a nice life and I don’t intend to give it up (or share it) with just anyone.
But, I digress. My new theory means that I also can’t blog about new people (or one guy in particular) because despite my best efforts to keep this blog completely hidden from real people in my life, there are two friends (that I know of) who read it on occasion. Therefore, by blogging about anything exciting happening in my love life I’m really just telling them.
So, mum’s the word for right now on new men.